This week, I couldn’t be more delighted to have my friend Jill Andersen, speaker, coach, and recovering rule follower as my guest on the Get the F*ck Off Podcast.

Jill is one of the founding members of my group, Day 1.

Recently, she had one of the most powerful speaking events of her career. The secret: being here now.

Like many of us, Jill used to “live in the future.”

“Once I get here then…”

The focus was always on “the next point,” rather than the joy in the journey.

When we live in the future, we miss what’s going on. 

We talked about many of the societal factors responsible for this, including how social media has developed.

A lot of people use social media as a representation of what isn’t versus a method of connection (its origin use.)

Everything has us focusing on a seemingly better endpoint, rather than being in the richness unfolding at every given moment.

When Jill spoke about her event, she had an awareness. As she eloquently said:

“The only thing I am here to do is to have an experience WITH THESE PEOPLE.

It wasn’t me coming in thinking, “oh are they gonna receive everything I’m giving them? Is this gonna change their life?”

That wasn’t the point. The point was going in there and sharing what I share and doing what I do in a way that only I can, just like everyone else has their gift of doing what they do… 

And it was this gift of ultimate presence in seeing each one of those people… and going on this journey with them in the time that we had.

The whole front-to-back experience was rich in a way I never had before.”

We often think can control other people’s experiences. We can’t.

We also can’t skip out on our own experience.

As Jill says “there’s no OASIS where you can have a Starbucks and wait for everything to pass.”

Life is good, bad, ugly, and blissful. All emotions are part of the human experience.

Jill also gives a crash course on eliminating “shoulds” from your life.

Known as “The Should Lady,” she points out that everything is a choice.

“We compare ourselves to other people. That’s why my life was a “should show.” My childhood was observing what everyone else was doing and thinking that’s how I have to do it.

Now I view “should” as the segue into a choice of “could I?”

You can learn more about booking Jill as a speaker by visiting her website heyjill.com.

Find her on Instagram @theshouldlady

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